A BRIT couple say swinging on cruise ships saved their marriage – and reveal why they believe the high seas are the best place to do it.
Kate, 43, and her husband Ant, 40, have sailed on more than 14 cruise lines and 45 ships since getting married in 2010.
They’ve clocked up around 120 nights at sea, and for the past year they’ve been doing it as a swinging couple.
They said it all began after a crisis point onboard.
“Our marriage hit a crossroads after Kate had a one-night stand on a cruise,” they said.
“Instead of hiding from it, we went to sex therapists and a couples counsellor to figure out whether we were ending the marriage or rewriting the rules.”
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To their surprise, therapy didn’t push them apart.
“They helped us realise that our bond was solid, but our sexual needs had changed, and ignoring that was the real risk.”
For them, non-monogamy strengthened rather than strained the relationship.
“Swinging isn’t breaking our marriage, it saved it,” they said.
According to Kate and Ant, communication is the biggest shift: “Communication we didn’t know we’d lost, came back ten-fold.
“We stopped shrinking ourselves to fit some old version of marriage.
“We became teammates again instead of co-parents rushing through life.”
Jealousy still happens, but doesn’t destabilise them.
The couple explained: “Seeing your partner desired by others is only hard when your relationship feels shaky.
“Once we rebuilt trust, it became exciting rather than threatening. That said, jealousy happens, because we’re human. But talking about it instead of burying it has made us stronger than ever.”
Kate and Ant said that actual bad experiences have been rare: “The only negative we’ve experienced is the odd single man who behaves entitled, not everyone understands the privilege of being invited into a marriage.
“We don’t do anything reckless. No alcohol-fuelled chaos. We’ve met some of the most respectful people we’ve ever known in this lifestyle.”
To them, what stings more is society’s judgment.
“The biggest negative is honestly the stigma not the lifestyle itself.”
‘Pressure-free playground’
The pair started cruising as an ethical non-monogamy (ENM) couple in early 2024, describing ships as the ideal setting for controlled freedom.
They explained: “Cruising for us is the perfect ‘pressure-free playground’ for exploring a more open dynamic. A feeling of being outside your normal life.
“We don’t seek chaos; we seek connection, honesty and a fresh chapter that has kept us together.”
Asked why cruise ships appeal to swingers, Kate and Ant listed three main reasons: “Freedom – you’re miles from home. No small-town gossip. No bumping into your friends in Tesco.
“Confidence – there’s something about sea air and sunshine makes you feel ten years younger.
“And community – swingers love travel and adventure, so naturally the two worlds overlap.”
Swinging isn’t breaking our marriage, it saved it
Kate and Ant
And they insist there’s no shortage of interest on regular ships.
“Cruise ships are basically floating cities.
“You’ll be shocked how many non-monogamous people are quietly onboard.
“Once you know the signs, the eye contact, the jewellery, the pineapples, it becomes surprisingly easy.”
They said apps like Swinghub have also transformed the scene adding: “Everything is more legitimised now.mYou can see who’s onboard, chat beforehand, arrange drinks, feel things out safely, it’s never been easier or safer.”
The couple revealed they not always feel the need for a themed cruise either, explaining that swing-specific sailings are popular but hard to fit into family life.
“Swing-specific cruises sell out fast and they’re often in the Caribbean but with young kids we can’t disappear for a week,” they said.
“So for now, we use mainstream cruises and connect with like-minded travellers through social media or Swinghub before we sail.”
Keeping it discreet
Only a small circle knows about their lifestyle offline.
The pair said: “A handful of people in our ‘real-life’ know for sure. But people suspect we’re not exactly conventional. We travel a lot and always have stories.”
Online, however, anonymity gives them space to speak freely.
Beyond cruises, Kate and Ant attend land-based events and run Playful Voyagers, their anonymous Instagram community offering “fun day trips and travel experiences” with a swinging-friendly vibe.
“We’ve built an anonymous online community with Playful Voyagers, where people actually understand the lifestyle (or want to), which is far safer than oversharing to family and friends,” they explained.
“The lifestyle community loves travel because it goes hand-in-hand with adventure, freedom, and playfulness.
You’ll be shocked how many non-monogamous people are quietly onboard
Kate and Ant
“Cruises will always be part of our story, but they’re not the whole story. We’re building on that.”
And to those who judge? They’ve heard it all.
Kate and Ant said: “Absolutely but mostly from people who think ‘open marriage’ means ‘unhappy marriage. Ours is the opposite.
“Once you’ve rebuilt your marriage from the roots up, other people’s opinions feel very small.”
They added: “We’re not here to convince anyone to be non-monogamous.
“We’re here to show that consensual honesty can look a lot more stable than secret cheating.
“If anything, we love that conversations about ENM are becoming more open.
“Swinghub, social media, and creators like us are helping turn whispering into normalising. And we’re proud to be part of that shift.”
Inside adult-only cruises
SLIPPING into an outrageously sexy black corset and stockings, Emily Spice asks her husband what he thinks of her outfit for the evening.
She is dressed to thrill and Darren’s excited smile tells her everything she needs to know before they head out to meet another couple for dinner.
In a few hours, after dining on steak and oysters at a fine dining restaurant, Emily and Darren’s evening will end with mind blowing sex, not just with each other but with the friends they just met.
This is an adults-only cruise like none other.
The two kinky couples are on a luxury cruise liner solely occupied by men and women who are looking for one thing only – wild and adventurous sex.
And to avoid them getting their conquests mixed up, Emily and Darren have a spreadsheet of who they’ll have sex with and when, as well as a timetable of the saucy parties they’ll attend across the week.
Read more here.